Hailing..... WEDNESDAY MEMO I Salute You All… Happy Woman Crush Wednesday I hope your day is going well. I need to talk to BVs Eka Joy, my sweetheart and blog frenemy, and Baci, my latest sweetheart. Both of you need to understand that someone is trying to knock your heads together. Don’t fall for it. I saw a comment that explained everything clearly..... some people who left the blog feeling wrongly accused have now decided to jam as many heads as possible.
You two beautiful women should be friends, or at least be chatting and minding your business and not becoming enemies. If they have succeeded in creating tension, please ignore each other, but I beg you: stop responding to whoever you think is behind it. Eka, I love your energy when you gist with us. Baci, I love your big grammar, but don’t use your words negatively. Avoid responding.
Ssssssssh. Come here and catch hugs for both of you. My train has moved to another lane. Do the same. Teejay, ignore the gaslighters. I just shake my head every time you feed the trolls with long writeups. Stop trying to prove you are good. If they say you are bad and about to scam me, let it be so. Come and scam me. Papa Chucky, you crack me up. I didn’t see you coming. You’re the male version of Baci.
However, please ignore them......I need to send Chucky something by month end.. come inbox and remind me. E don do! *********************** Aint No Space For Bad Energy ***************** NOTORIOUS FOR JESUS So, this girl was dating this guy, and there was another guy who lived in the room right behind hers. They were friendly neighbors, nothing more. The girl’s boyfriend told her he didn’t like the fact that she was friends with her male neighbor and insisted that she stop all forms of familiarity with him.
The girl tried to explain, “There’s nothing between us. He’s just my neighbor.” But her boyfriend wasn’t having it. One of his reasons was that whenever he came to visit his girlfriend, the male neighbor never greeted him. And I was like, “Wait, what? You don’t even live in that compound. You are the visitor! Shouldn’t you be the one greeting people?” Anyway, the boyfriend gave her an ultimatum: if she continued relating with her male neighbor, he would break up with her.
The girl eventually gave in. Then one night, the male neighbor came home very late and called out to everyone to help him open the gate. Nobody responded. He had no choice but to call the girl. Of course, he had no idea her boyfriend was around. When the girl was about to go and open the gate for her neighbor, her boyfriend stopped her and warned her that if she dared go, she could kiss the relationship goodbye.
The girl ignored him. She told him that neighbors are like family. If anything happens, it is often the people living around you who will know and help first, not your boyfriend who doesn’t even live there. So, she went ahead and opened the gate for her neighbor. The following day, her boyfriend left angrily. Later, he sent her a message saying the relationship was over. When I heard the story, I concluded that this girl may have just escaped a controlling and manipulative narcissist.
Because, honestly, why would someone dictate who their partner can greet, talk to, or maintain a normal neighborly relationship with? And the ultimatum, “Stop talking to him or I’ll leave you” was already a major red flag. My suspicion is that this guy may have wanted to end the relationship for a while. He was probably just looking for an excuse, and eventually, he found one.
I dont think he wanted to end the relationship, he was angry that he disobeyed him. Angry that he cannot control her...I hope she didnt go back to beg cos God saved her from him.....There are many men like him out there giving such rules in relationships...... When i was single, I met someone who ordered that whenever he was around me, i must not pick my ringing phones.....I was shocked and told him that wont fly with me.......
He was isoko and excited about marrying me cos of my tribe..... One day, we were together and my phone kept ringing, it was one of those celebs trying to reach me......I was a star struck writer..I ignored him and picked my calls...After he left, he cut off contact and told everyone that i disobeyed and will not be a good wife:...LMAO!!! **************** MARRIAGE QUESTION. A husband asked his wife: "If I become poor tomorrow and lose everything I have, will you still love me?"
His wife smiled and replied: "I didn't marry your money. I married the man who made me feel loved, cared for, protected, and valued." That response is interesting…. What keeps a marriage stronger in the long run? A. Love ? B. Money ? C. Care? D. Protection? E. Respect? F. All of the above? Many people fall in love because of attraction, but they stay in love because they feel safe, appreciated, supported, and cared for.
A good spouse is not just someone who says "I love you." A good spouse shows love through actions: Checking on you when you're tired. Standing by you during difficult times. Protecting your peace and reputation. Supporting your dreams. Making you feel important every day. #copied It is all of the above for me oooooo and most importantly the money part...LOL ******************* LEARN.....
1. Compliment others, you may forget it but they remember it forever 2. Say what you mean, mean what you say 3. Never lend money that you would be upset to lose, lending ends relationships 4. Never borrow money to satisfy material yearnings.Wait till you can afford it!. 5. No one is pressuring you to achieve anything… Most times, the pressure you feel is the pressure you placed on yourself! copied *************************************** THE BIGGEST FEAR OF MANY NIGERIAN MEN IS AN INDEPENDENT WOMAN One major reason many women and girls remain in abusive relationships is poverty.
The Nigerian economy is hard on everyone, but it affects women differently because financial dependence can trap them in situations they would otherwise leave. Many women stay not because they are happy, safe or loved , they stay because survival has become tied to the relationship. I have said many times that one of the biggest threats to patriarchy is female economic independence.
The more women are educated, skilled and financially secure, the more freedom they have to make decisions based on dignity, safety and wellbeing rather than desperation. Let me give a simple example. I have two Nigerian female colleagues abroad — one is 25 and the other is 28. Both were born and raised in Nigeria and have only lived abroad for five and six years. The 28‑year‑old drives a 2025 Toyota, while the 25‑year‑old drives a 2026 Ford.
Both are single. Now compare that to Nigeria: how many women between 25 and 30 are driving even a 2015 car? What percentage of young women own a 2020 car, let alone a brand‑new one? At my workplace, the oldest woman is 32. Most are White, with a few Black women. None drives a car older than 2020. So tell me , how do you promise such women a phone and expect them to lose their minds?
How do you lure them with ordinary clothes and handbags? Why wouldn’t such women walk away the moment you start misbehaving? That is why I keep saying: the day the average Nigerian woman can comfortably afford her own iPhone, buy her own car, pay her own rent and fund her own lifestyle without depending on any relationship, many Nigerian men will finally realise how little they actually bring to the table.
That day will mark the beginning of the decentring of men. Most Nigerian men fear an independent woman because a woman who knows her worth and can support herself is far less likely to tolerate abuse, exploitation, humiliation or endless suffering in the name of marriage or relationships. A lot of what we call endurance today is actually fear. A lot of what we call patience is actually dependency.
A lot of what we call commitment is actually a lack of options. That day is near. #copied *********************