No, You won't call me Tony, I don't subscribe to that kind of oyinbo lifestyle

There are different perspectives here. In some organizations and cultures, using first names is normal. But context matters most. When you’re speaking with someone of Mr. Elumelu’s stature, respect in how you address them should come first. 

In that setting, the correction was necessary.

It is therefore worthy of being noted that before we address people, we should consider their status, and the context of such gathering. We shouldn't just address them by their first name, unless the context demands so. Besides, we should do well to recognize their title/titles.

Another important thing to consider in relation to the context of gathering is the predominant culture. Not just officially, it is culturally disrespectful to address people by their first name in such a gathering, especially a person of such stature.

Look at society, look at this clip. Our sense of respect is fading, and we cannot pretend not to see it.

So we must be the correction: in our words, in our conduct: in public and in private.

Classroom or not, we teach. Because someone is always watching. Someone is learning from the way we carry ourselves.

And it starts with one rule: "Treat everyone with respect, regardless of status or age." Hold to that, and we raise a generation with self-control and dignity.

Let’s address these two things one by one:

1. “Good morning, Tony” by a trainee and “Good morning, Tony “ by an interviewer abroad.

When I used to write on issues like this, you remember when I was bitterly triggered by Sir Otedola book and the takes by supposed establishment Nigerians who think of everything from a one sided angle of assumption but not experience. 

I repeat again, everything you’ll learn about etiquette, networking, high net worth-relationships, mindset and the likes from rich people, especially African, most especially Nigerian rich/high profiled people, as an average/poor/struggling person, in fact! As a subordinate, take it with a bucket of salt and truckload of wisdom. Because these rules and regulations are selectively applied, most of it only favors you during speeches and eye service based engagements. 

A typical Nigerian big man will teach you about audacity and confidence in the face of opportunities, how to not appear intimidated or too humble, they’ll tell you to stretch your hand for a handshake, sit in front of a CEO boldly and cross your legs, that that is a sign of confidence, but once you try it!! Once you try it on them !! lol.

They will fling you out and demonize your audacity! How dare! You!!! Who are you to stretch your hand for a handshake to a whole principalities and powers in high places? 

But na that same person and his goons teach you ooh. 

But when a rich counterpart, or someone they know doesn’t need them for anything does the exact same thing, they will shake the person with cameras capturing in the moment. 

Now we saw a video who same Sir Tony sat at an interview with another Nigerian that some alleged on X that it’s even a paid interview, the girl greeted him with same “Tony” and there wasn’t any problem. 

Do you know why this one is a problem? It’s a trainee. Trained by who? Same Organization by Sir Tony. And like many have said, they were trained as bankers in such corporate environments to call people by their first names, now she practiced what was taught on their Oga and now it’s a problem, it’s oyimbo stuff. 

lol. When it comes to people of lower status, many things will come in play like “read the room” 

Shuuuu 

Toh. Personally, I wouldn’t call him “Tony” in any setting at all but I do not think this lady intentionally called him that to disrespect him. 

If we are to truly dissect everything, His response came off a bit condescending to me sha. “You will not call me that…” 

It didn’t sound like a matter of preference but a problem of WHO was calling him by his first name.

2. We have Adaife talking about young women in Nigeria only aspiring to be lash and nail techs, social media managers, VAs, etc and nobody wants to be an astronaut, researcher, kini kini.

lol. Bro! This is by a lady who owns a digital service agency for remote workers like SMM and VAs ooh, you’ll think she only employs astronauts and CIA agents. 

Omoh! We do not have Otedola, TOE, Dangote, Adeleke, children becoming Lashtech and SMM, it’s still the struggling Nigerians who many are graduates that have to abandon their certificates and look for what will give them food and sort their bills first. 

When same Adaife was restlessly teaching digital skills till she grew to what she is today, she didn’t think of becoming an engineer, astronaut or researcher ooh,, now you have blow and have join the Big people, big talk circle.

She has forgotten completely what the reality of over 50% of the population of Nigerians looks like. 

Talking about “look at the people we celebrate…” from someone that a whole group of people came together to support into growth. 

Omoh eeh

Toh #thereisaplaceforwisdom

The policies, the rules, the speeches , the mindsets are built based on the positions and realities of the people making them per time.

Use wisdom and carefulness as you navigate through survival.